Sunday, 14 October 2018

links + loves

Happy Monday!

Wednesday, 10 October 2018

Why I've Been So MIA Lately.

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I'm not ready to disclose everything, yet. I'm ready to share some but not all of what's been going on in my life lately. It's something that has been so big in the news right now and I need to share my story.

Trigger warning: I'm talking about sexual abuse in this post. 

Right now, our media headlines have been filled with stories about Brett Kavanaugh and what he did to Dr. Ford. Plus throw in Bill Cosby's sentencing and you have a lengthy amount of triggers for rape survivors. With the #metoo movement and #whyIdidn'treport hashtag, we're seeing more and more women coming forward with what's happened to them. It's empowering to see how many women feel the strength to come forward. It's baffling. It's wonderful though that women are finally getting their voices. In mid July, I got mine.

Mid July, I shared a story with my mom about being sexually abused by a family member when I was growing up. I was humiliated, frightening. I shook the entire time I talked about it. I finally felt comfortable telling my mom as I had stopped talking to said family member. My mom was horrified and disgusted, as you would expect. She encouraged me to go to the police but I wasn't ready yet.

Come August, I was camping with my boyfriend. I was having a nightmare about the family member and what had happened. He had to wake me up so I would stop screaming. That weekend, I finally had the courage to speak to a police officer for closure. A uniformed officer asked me what I needed to speak to an officer about. I yelled it out. He then called in a female officer, stating that women typically prefer to speak to women officers. I remember sitting in the lobby of my local police station, shaking, convinced that it would go nowhere. The officer that I spoke to was amazing. She gave me her cell phone number so I could call her if I ever needed to chat about the case and told me that she would forward my case onto a detective.

A week later, I was in a police station again.

I talked to the detectives and I explained what happened in detail. The interview lasted about an hour. She promised me that she was going to get me justice. Weeks went by and I felt as though nothing was going to happen. I felt as though I hit a wall.

On September 14, I was driving down the road around 9 am. There was a police cruiser that I passed. I just knew in my gut that my family member was in there. At about 5:30 that night, I got the call. He was arrested and confessed to the detective. It felt like I was finally getting justice. He's currently out on bail (he isn't allowed within a certain distance of me as part of his conditions) but I have faith that it will work out in my favour. His first court date is less than a week away.

It's not often that women feel as though they can come forward and they can get justice. My advice is to go. Advocate for yourself, ask to speak to detectives. Get the justice that you deserve. It's overwhelming and scary but it's worth it.

I feel bad for everyone in my life. I feel as though I've been an absent friend and family member because I've been so wrapped up in everything going on with this case. I know it's all going to work out in the end and I know that the important people will stay by my side. I'm so sorry to everyone I've been MIA to, and I'm sorry that I haven't been keeping up with my blog while this is going on. I'm thankful for my mom, my boyfriend and my friends who haven't left my side through this process.

I'm looking forward to getting justice for what's happened to me. It's time for me to heal and come to terms about what happened. I hope that one day I can share some advice about what this moment in my life has taught me.

Sunday, 7 October 2018

links + loves

I've been super missing-in-action on the blog lately. It's been driving me insane but life has been crazy lately. I'm sharing a blog post on Wednesday that goes more in depth and has been one of the most personal posts I'll ever write. For now though, here's some links I've stumbled upon the past few days.

I love this guilty pleasure list, it makes me want to write one of my own!

I've been dodging the Brett Kavanaugh/Dr. Ford situation in the media. However, I loved this post from the protests.

Everything you need to know about CBD oil.

This cardigan looks so cozy!

The scariest ghost stories ever, straight from Reddit.

11 plants that clean the air more than air purifiers.

Love these ankle boots and they're under $50.

Will always love this purse - and this colour.

I love Halsey's new single.

Friday, 28 September 2018

My 4 Favourite Autobiographies

The other day I was sharing autobiography recommendations to one of my girlfriends. While we were talking, I thought it was a good idea to share some of my favourite autobiographies! I love a good autobiography, especially if they're a lighter read. I typically pick up a good autobiography if I can read it in a day or two and don't have to put my focus onto the book.

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me (and other concerns) by Mindy Kaling
This is definitely in my top three favourite autobiographies. There's something about Mindy Kaling's writing in this book that just got me. It is based on her rise to fame and stories from The Office. The one thing that I love about this book, and that sticks out to me, is that it's written more as a comedic self-help book compared to the typical autobiography. My favourite part of this whole book? When Mindy shares the alternative titles she had for the book. My two favourites are: "There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it" and "Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched."

And of course, my absolute favourite quote from the entire book:
"I’m only marginally qualified to be giving advice at all. My body mass index is certainly not ideal, I frequently use my debit card to buy things that cost less than three dollars because I never have cash on me, and my bedroom is so untidy it looks like vandals ransacked the Anthropologie Sale section. I’m kind of a mess."

Why Not Me by Mindy Kaling
This is Mindy Kaling's second autobiography, that's just as good as the first. This book is written as a series of personal essays including ex-boyfriends, secrets for the beauty industry and the fixation of weight on women in the entertainment industry. One of my absolute favourite parts of the whole book is when she talks about proper tailoring; she explains a time when she wore an Old Navy dress that she had properly tailored and received more compliments on it than expensive dresses she bought.

My favourite quote from the book:
"Playful arguments would become fits of uncontrollable laughter, and, like magic, that experience would be crystallized into a private joke, and the private joke would get boiled down to a simple phrase, which became a souvenir of the entire experience. For years to come, the phrase alone could uncork hours of renewed laughter. And as everyone knows, the best kind of laughter is laughter born of a shared memory."

Talking as Fast as I Can: From Gilmore Girls to Gilmore Girls by Lauren Graham
If you've read my blog for a while, you know that I'm a diehard Gilmore Girls fan. I loved this book so, so much. It shares Lauren Graham's story from when she was young until the Gilmore Girls revival. Plus, she includes some great pictures from behind the scenes at the revival. She also shares little details from her time on Gilmore Girls, from meeting Alexis Bledel for the first time in Toronto to stealing a jacket from the set. There's so many great tales from her GG and Parenthood days. It's definitely a great, quick read. I've read it four times now and can typically finish it in a day or two.

My favourite quote from the book:
"In my experience, there’s no secret to accomplishing almost any goal worth pursuing."

Scrappy Little Nobody by Anna Kendrick
I'll admit, I didn't love this as much as I loved Mindy Kaling's books but it did have some funny moments. Similar to Why Not Me, it's a series of personal essays about Anna Kendrick's personal and professional life. I think one thing that I love about Anna Kendrick is that her filmography is so wide - from movies like Pitch Perfect to movies like Drinking Buddies; she has such an appeal to her. It genuinely feels like you're spending an afternoon with your bestie when you read this book.

I have to share two quotes I loved from this book:
"Wear the Spanx. You might not want to squeeze them over your ass in the morning, but when you see that mac and cheese at lunch (do it, you beautiful monster) you’ll be glad they’re there, doing the lord’s work."

"I gave up on being nice. I started putting more value on other qualities instead: passion, bravery, intelligence, practicality, humor, patience, fairness, sensitivity. Those last three might seem like they are covered by 'nice,”'but make no mistake, they are not. A person who smiles a lot and remembers everyone’s birthday can turn out to be undercover crazy, a compulsive thief, and boring to boot. I don’t put a lot of stock in nice. I’d prefer to be around people who have any of the above qualities over “niceness,” and I’d prefer it if that applied to me, too."

Wednesday, 26 September 2018

The Perfect Fall Home Decor on Amazon